How To Visit The Klingon Empire With Honor (And Without Getting Killed)

• 10 years ago

This post is part of Geek Takeover Week 2014.

tlhIngan wo’ yajbe’ wa’ ‘ej Qo’noS DIvI’ nep vo’ moj yor galactic ghoch Hov trek wa’. Human nuqneH maH juH Dachegh yuQmey Hem nugh, qatlh qach SuvwI’ tlhIngan SIQpu’bogh. pagh wej maHvaD nIS, tIgh, conform pIH pagh nIS comfort ma’. wo’ ngeD wej nov HochHom ‘ach wej jegh laH SuyItHa’ moj maHvaD motlhjaj ghu’vam Huj lurDech je mIw vaj tlhIngan tIq.

Ha’, ‘ach not naQ lutDaj, ghogh Huv

“Klingons don’t embrace other cultures, we conquer them.”

-General Martok Deep Space

Nineincessant malja’ mu’ “please” ‘ej “thank you'” wej chergh SuvwI’ law’ wej qaSpu’bogh nIv’e’, chaH qaStaHvIS tlhIngan Hol. jatlh tlhIngan, manajtaHvIS qaStaHvIS HoS jachpu’DI’, confident ghogh. latlh vuv ‘ach wej qI’ weakness pagh cha’ pagh decisions ‘oH defer. laH Dev vIq tIch botlhDaq pa”e’ surely wej taH SoH. wej DanoHmeH tlhInganpu’ nov vaj qaSmoHlu’ chaHvaD waH vuDmey’e’ HoS. reH yIQam ‘ach not naQ lutDaj, poStaHvIS petaQ mIn contact leH, wuv yInlIj ‘oH.

tlhIngan qub jablu’DI’ yIn

Ha’ Hutlh sustenance wutlh yoHbogh outside of tlhIngan wo’ qo’ pIj qaq Heghpu’ flesh, lo’ law’ qaStaHvIS DIvI’ replicated, Sop. Soj vaj alive HeghDI’ QIchlIj Hot ‘oH until Ho’Du’ jej yIHoH.

‘op potlhmeyDaq nay’ qaSnISbej ‘e’ nID SoH HeghDI’ jIghIQ:

• Gagh – tlhIngan Soj, ghargh Durgh le vIraknIl ghargh je.
• Raktijino – tlhIngan qa’vIn HoS law’ Human ‘ejDo’ nIn HoS.
• Blood Wine (‘Iw HIq) – rogh targh (a Klingon hog) ‘Iw HoS law’ raktijino HoS.
• Racht – nagh gagh ‘ach Huch law’ weghbogh ghargh.

roD ‘ach mach wIv, naQ leng ghung slop rep SoH offers ‘ach vaj roD, pagh burgh SoH qub, nuq tlhIngan Soj jach SoH juHqo’.

qeq ‘e’ tlhop

qaSchoH latlh HochHom cultures infinitely pagh tun law’ tun tlhIngan culture, HochHom vIrurqu’law’ ‘ut ’emvo’ wo’ Qu’ bImejnIS. wej yIt streets Qo’noS Hutlh qaSlaH d’k tahg – a warriors knife. wa’ qeng proudly wej neH wIqelDI’, maHeDnIS tlhIngan nugh tob ‘ach chaq SoH pol vo’ qaDta’bogh pong latlhpu’ qogh. naH jajmeymaj HochHom tlhInganpu’ ghob chaH ’emvo’ ngoq batlh ‘ej QuQ roj poQ vaj nI’ law’ leH batlh ‘e’ SuvwI’.

Finally, it’s important you learn some of the local language before heading anywhere in the Klingon Empire. Pick up a Klingon dictionary, Rosetta Stone for Klingon, and use Bing’s Klingon translator for this page (though Kronos gets converted into “Denmark“), which you can use to decipher this post. Qa’plah!